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Psychologist's Opinion: Why You Shouldn't Please Everyone
02.08.2023 17:00
Updated: 13.05.2024 21:24
If you feel like you can please people, you are not alone. In a 2022 YouGov poll, 49% of adults surveyed described themselves as people-pleasing people.
What does it mean to please others
A person who pleases will do anything to please others, whether they are asked to, or whether the person "understands" what people want from him. Such a person puts himself one step below other people, giving priority to other significant (both positively and negatively) people for him.
When a person wants to please everyone
Lack of selfishness and a tendency to self-sacrifice are usually considered positive qualities. But some are afraid of upsetting others all their lives and strive to please others, often forgetting about their own interests. Psychologists call such people pliers.
Why can't we please everyone
If you strive to please everyone, then you begin to take to heart everything that other people say about you. Even the smallest remark that another person made to you can spoil your mood for the whole day. Remember that you don't always have to take what other people say seriously.
The reason for this behavior is simple: we all want to be liked, we expect approval, love and care. But the root of the problem is low self-esteem. It is she who encourages us to perform energy-consuming, unusual actions, giving up our own comfort in favor of the convenience of other people.
